congrats to river trash on beating land trash for best trash 2014 trophy. fish skeleton & apple core played hard but simply outclassed by tyre & boot

welcome to the house of pain mother fucker. the whack shack. the suplex duplex. the homicide domicile

hey every one check out my podcast where i get a scientist to point out all the wrong things about recent sci fi films. no link for this one

there are three types of people in this world: those who define themselves by a characteristic, those who define themselves by a different characteristic, and a third type

i say, pardner, that’s a damn fine bullet-ridden cowboy you got there. mind if i rip a cone through it

i’ve been calling everything “ecztreme” and “eczellent” and “eczecrable” and this dry skin idiot still doesn’t realize im making fun of him

I’m like, “it’s cool, guy, probably when they get in there they won’t have enough room to move around much so there probably won’t be much damage, right,” and I keep herding the bulls into the china shop.

So the china shop owner guy is still worried, I guess, but he’s no dummy. He know cows can’t walk backwards. So he lets me herd them in to his shop because now he’s signed on for this experiment he might as well see how it turns out.

"That’s all the bulls," I say, shutting the shop door and waving at a taxi. "Wait a minute," the shop guy says, "where are you going? What am I supposed to do with all these bulls? What about the experiment?"

"I don’t care about the experiment," I tell him, breezily. "Do whatever you want. Sell them, for all I care. It’s none of my business."

Then he’s all, my shop, yada yada, everything broken, all the plates and cups and whatever, blah blah. So I’m like, “Why do you need cups so much, guy???”

Later, I find out that the guy was a Nazi or something, which works out for me.

church is bogus. if i want a weird guy to put on a dress & tell history death stories i can do it myself, at home, in the mirror, by myself